With so much on the line – change can feel overwhelming
You’ve spent years building a career that you’re proud of. You’ve made connections and people respect your contributions to your work and your industry. And it probably hasn’t been easy. You’ve sacrificed; your time, your hobbies, other passions; and you’ve committed yourself to learning and growing and climbing to a place that should feel awesome. And yet there’s this part of you that wonders – is this all there is? You’ve reached the career you strived for, but it just doesn’t feel all that fulfilling and you’ve started to wonder if maybe it really is time to make that change. But with so much on the line, a change can feel terrifying.
The thought of walking away from what you’ve worked so hard to create feels reckless, maybe even ungrateful. But staying feels like slowly disappearing. You’re standing at that crossroads, wondering whether wanting something different makes you foolish or if you are finally being honest with yourself.
The Weight of What You’ve Built
There’s a particular kind of fear that comes with considering a career shift when you’ve already achieved a certain level of success. It sits differently than the fear of failure. This one whispers about what you might lose rather than what you might not get. That’s why this pivot feels especially terrifying; there’s more on the line than ever before.
The tricky part about being successful is that everyone around you sees evidence that you should stay where you are. You’ve moved up the property ladder and have the house you love. You’re driving the car you’ve always dreamed of owning. You vacation to the places you really want to go to and your kids don’t have to worry about who’s paying for University. All of these are wonderful external examples of how hard you’ve worked and they are all things that should be enjoyed and savoured. But as we advance in our careers, and our lifestyles change and the responsibilities mount, the pressure to maintain all you’ve built weighs heavily and keeps you rooted in place. Your mortgage, your family’s stability, your professional reputation. These aren’t small things. The fear of destabilizing what you’ve carefully constructed is real and valid. But so is the cost of ignoring what your gut keeps trying to tell you.
Rethinking The Change
I’ve started over many times and it was something that I hadn’t anticipated in my youthful exuberance of industry domination. I was going to take over the world and build a career that others envied. I fantasized about the house, the trips, the money…but I hadn’t thought about the disconnection, or the hollow feeling that comes after years working and building in a job or industry that now feels less fulfilling.
Many of us are different people in our 30’s than we were in our 20’s. And even more different as we go through our 40’s and beyond. Our priorities change, but often what we want out of our career does too. We’ve lived a life, filled with setbacks, upsets, joy and surprises. Who we grow into often doesn’t connect with the goals and aspirations we set all those years ago, yet we’ve built a life that we’re proud of, even if it doesn’t feel like it fits anymore.
What I learned in my many transitions is that when we look at change as the pivot point it is, rather than starting over, we acknowledge that the skills, expertise, knowledge and grit we’ve developed and accumulated over the years becomes the asset that marks our next chapter. We bring all of that into something new that can invigorate us with an enthusiasm we haven’t tapped into in years. It isn’t starting over, it’s continuing through.
But, that’s much easier to say than to actually do. The fear of compromising what you’ve built can keep you trapped in a redundancy that maintains the status quo, but feels like you’re running on auto pilot.
A Reframing Exercise for Your Own Career Shift
Change is continually happening and you likely embrace it everyday without even giving it a second thought. A new direction on a project, evening plans that had to be rearranged, compromising within your family. Change direction, pivot, alter. The challenge for the bigger changes, the more meaningful transitions, is staying grounded and calm when the outcome feels overwhelming.
When fear of change keeps you stuck, try this process to shift your perspective:
- Write down everything you’re afraid of losing if you make a change. Be specific and honest. Financial security, professional identity, the approval of people whose opinions matter to you. Get it all on paper.
- Now write down what you’re currently losing by staying. Energy, creativity, connection to your work, the feeling that your days actually belong to you. This list often surprises people.
- Look at both lists and ask yourself: which losses can I live with? Which ones am I already living with?
- Identify one small action that would move you toward curiosity rather than commitment. A conversation, some research, a question you’ve been avoiding. Movement creates information.
- Notice your energy after taking that small action. Do you feel more alive or more drained? Your body often knows before your mind does.
The Next Chapter is Your’s to Determine
Career transitions at this stage aren’t about throwing away what you’ve built. They’re about deciding what gets to come with you into the next chapter. Your life is your’s to live. With passion, with purpose and with connection. It takes courage and commitment to be honest with yourself about where you are and where you’d like to go. There’s no rush; take your time. Ask yourself the questions. Don’t shy away from what your heart tells you. You’ve built a wonderful life; just think of how much more you can create.
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