Could you be a late bloomer?

A few months ago an article in The Atlantic, titled, You Might be a Late Bloomer, kept showing up in my social media feed. I ignored it at first as I mindlessly scrolled through the various ads, updates and articles that seem to clog my feed most days. But as it kept popping up, it intrigued me enough to give it a read.

I’m sure that the algorithm was adequately reflecting my search history. I tend to like to research and read about purpose and direction. It’s of particular interest to me as its a topic that tends to come up with many clients I work with. It’s no surprise that articles often show up that follow that same theme. This one got me thinking a bit more introspectively though. If we find purpose, success and even adoration later in life, does that mean we weren’t up to par before? Are we truly a late bloomer, or has our experiences and life to that point shaped who we were now becoming?

Is it all in good timing?

The article provides some good points, most particularly that we live in a society that seems to promote early bloomers. The twenty-something prodigy, the tech maverick whose barely out of school, the high school athlete poised for the primetime. We seem to marvel at how amazing these people are, how it must have taken so much dedication to get where they were. This thinking has always troubled me though. The thought of peaking so early never excited me; what comes next after you’ve already hit the top?

While I hold this view more passionately than most, it still makes me question our rhetoric around late achievers. Are we mis-directing our praise to the youth? Why is it so remarkable when someone beings something later and ultimately finds success? Maybe it’s more about preparation, experience and good timing.

With age does come advantage

It makes a lot of sense that the older we get, the better at something we become. We’ve had a lot of time to repeat and redo things and for many, their work becomes almost second nature to them. But while we are all pushing through in careers that we chose when barely out of school, we’ve developed so many other skills along the way. Skills that only add to success in later pursuits.

Patience, experience, collaboration, listening. These may be things that we thought we knew when we were young, but as we progress through work and life, we realize we didn’t really know at all. Older adults have also seen a lot. They’ve lived through extreme anxiety and stress, managed unbelievable situations, and many times, have come out on the other side. There’s a calmness that ensues, an “I’ve seen it all” mindframe that helps to provide a more pragmatic approach rather than knee-jerk reactions. We know it probably will be okay, and if it’s not? Well, we’ll just have to pivot and change course.

The best things I’ve noticed with many of my clients is the ability to be much more patient with others, but also much less tolerable of the fluff. This too makes for a successful brew of knowing and being – the wisdom that comes only through age.

There’s probably more to it

The article in The Atlantic goes into much more detail and provides some interesting perspectives (seriously, it’s worth the time to give it a read), so I won’t go into the all the research and examples myself. But, it does beg us to rethink how we view our own accomplishments and what makes it worth it to ourselves.

At times of transition it can be very easy to get stuck in the mental cycle of confusion, uncertainty and stagnation. I see it often, and even with the most accomplished and self-assured. After spending decades working and building into “something” they often ask “who and what am I if I start all over again”?

Even those who have not been able to achieve their desires up to this point often worry that they’ll never find the passion and purpose they strive for. That they in fact, may never bloom at all.

The truth is simple, but oh so hard to accept

The fact of the matter is, and the real truth behind finding success whether early or later in life, is as individual as every person. My experience is that the people who find true meaning in what they are doing later in life is because it was a choice they made for themselves at a time that was right for them. They bring all of the skills they developed and hard-earned experience into something new that’s exciting, and different and speaks deeply to their soul. And while they be unsure of the path forward, they have an optimsm developed through time, relationships, hardships and work that lets them know, at their core, that they’ve got this. A trusting of their own self.

So, if you find yourself thriving in a pursuit later in life does that really mean you are a late bloomer? Could you have found that elusive piece, missing from your previous endeavours? Possibly.

More than likely, you’ve done the natural human thing and evolved. You’ve tried and failed. Stopped and started again. Created a lifetime of examples, experiences and ideas. It’s not that you’re late to the table; you were gathering intel along the way.

And those that seem to peak early, who find “success” (whatever that truly means) early in life shouldn’t be described as early bloomers either. Because that early success is paving the way for something meaningful in the future.

So in the end….

Whether we find success early, or we bloom late, our journey is one of learning and building on what we’ve done before. As we continue to grow and expand, we can find success at any point in our lives. The key is to savour, relish and keep on moving.